Although the statistic that half of all marriages in the United States eventually end in divorce seems to be a myth, divorce is still a fact of modern life. Divorce rates have actually declined since the mid-1980s, possibly because of later marriages. Divorce rates also vary by state.
When you’re the one who’s getting a divorce, you don’t care what the statistics say. You’re in pain, you’re grieving dreams that have died, and you’re ready to move on.
Traditionally, each partner “lawyers up” and heads to court, which can be a long, messy, and financially costly process. Ideally, you and your partner would hash out the details of your divorce — including dividing assets, possible support or alimony, and custody of children or pets — amicably and on your own.
However, if you’re divorcing, talking to your partner without anger or feeling threatened or dismissed may be impossible. In fact, many of the issues you experienced as a couple and as an individual in an unhappy relationship come up again in the divorce itself.
A divorce mediator facilitates communication and makes the divorce easier and even shorter in the long run. About two-thirds of couples who choose to work with a mediator feel satisfied with the outcome of their divorce.
That’s why our expert team of counselors at The Soho Center for Mental Health offer divorce mediation at our offices in Greenwich Village, Manhattan, New York City. You can also opt for HIPAA-compliant teletherapy.
Would you and your partner benefit from divorce mediation? If you’d like a divorce that’s as fair and pain-free as possible, it could be the best choice. Here’s why.
Divorce mediation starts with individual therapy sessions with each partner. That way, you can freely share your anger, issues that need to be resolved, and the obstacles you’ve had in communicating with your partner.
By listening to each of you, without input from the other, we gain perspective on what each of you needs to facilitate the divorce amicably. We then devise a customized mediation plan in which we help you communicate with one another civilly and productively, so that you reach compromises that satisfy you both.
When a relationship breaks down, problems with communication and trust are often at the root of the fissure. These problems continue as you hash out the details of your divorce. In fact, they can make the divorce process incredibly stressful and may leave you feeling dissatisfied with any agreement you and your lawyers devise.
By acting as a third, neutral party, we help you and your partner communicate more without blame. We guide you to set and maintain healthy boundaries, and to listen actively without reacting impulsively.
Depending on the age of your children, and their own needs, they may benefit from being part of the mediation process. Again, this is decided on a case-by-case basis and begins with our team meeting with your child or children to help determine if they’d gain from being included in decisions about custody and other areas of the divorce that directly affect them.
Of course, if you’d prefer not to expose your children to mediation itself, we can meet with them separately throughout the divorce. Counseling can help your children better process their feelings during this time of transition and ease them into their new lifestyle, too.
Once you’ve settled the major issues of your divorce, each of you can move on into your separate lives with greater ease. By working through your issues to reach satisfying conclusions, you’re less likely to feel bitter over the divorce and its outcome.
Divorce mediation makes the messy business of ending a relationship easier on you, your partner, and your family. To start the process, contact our team for a consultation and customized treatment today. We also offer divorce mediation via teletherapy.